Hairy Hairy


Kaviar Kavalier is back with the new, already sixth consecutive album, which is dedicated to all the girls and women who don’t shave their genitals and stay naturally hairy. Some of the tracks are even sort of eulogies and celebrations of hairy genitalia and armpits, which I’m currently more than obsessed with. (Tom)


1. Hairy hairy
2. Koh Chang
3. Grüner Veltliner
4. Po stovkách zánětů
5. Hévíz
6. Chlupatá
7. Karavänseráj
8. Hey hey Mister
9. Pneumonium
10. Pantagruel
11. Kolika
All music and lyrics by Tom Necrocock





Nur für starke Nerven

cca 45 min.


Welcome to the hairy 70’s

Sample trailer for the new album Hairy Hairy by fetishist clan Kaviar Kavalier. The trailer contains samples of the songs: Hairy hairy, Koh Chang, Grüner Veltliner, Po stovkách zánětů, Hévíz, Chlupatá, Karavänseráj, Hey hey Mister, Pneumonium, Pantagruel, Kolika.
Kaviar Kavalier are: Tom Necrocock, Sambar, Honza Kapák, Andrea Baslová, Nazaru Bokaz.
All music and lyrics by Tom Necrocock





Kaviar Kavalier – Hairy Hairy
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Kaviar Kavalier family on hippie trail


Kaviar Kavalier HAIRY HAIRY T-shirt

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Kaviar Kavalier – T-shirt
Hairy Logo
300 CZK

Kaviar Kavalier – T-shirt
Hairy Tom
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English translation by Nazaru Bokaz


Hairy hairy

Hairy, hairy. Kissed by the muse.

Give me a medal. They‘re wild all day.

Hairy, hairy, next to dairies.

Under your soft black beaver

 tears drip with a plea.
Fingers wander through the soft grove.

A white stream sprays out of the body.
Passion strengthens, the lap is eager.
Hairy, hairy, the cult is revived.

Long hall echoes with footsteps out.
Fairies go mad, the lap is shaved.
Someone shoots.

The depilator will be crippled.

He will be executed at any moment.

Girls wail.

Hairy, hairy, hairy, hairy.

Hairy, hairy, hairy, hairy.

Hairy, hairy, hairy, hairy.

Hairy, hairy, hairy, hairy.

I like groins of hairy women

from Indochina, immersed in them.

No spleens.

Ballerinas, wombs of Rossies.

Wet diapers of women from tanneries.
I have no strength left.

Hairy, hairy, hairy, hairy.

Hairy, hairy, hairy, hairy.

Hairy, hairy, hairy, hairy.

Hairy, hairy, hairy, hairy.

Koh Chang


When the wind shakes the windowpane, I melt under the girl,
hairy and eager, hidden from my wife.
Faded curtains drawn, we are soaked in the bedding,
trapped in a tropical storm. We vacuum up the hairs.

My darling on the island of Koh Chang is already asleep.
She has wild dreams about that woeful misfortune.
She hides memories of me under the bedstead
and brushes her hair.

Yesterday they found her unconscious on White Sand Beach.
A bit further, her native hut burned to ashes.
The police are getting closer to the investigation.
The tracks lead to Prague.

Beware, they’re already coming to us. They’re already talking to your grandpa.
They’re coming to avenge the pale girl, hairy and eager.
The villa’s shutters are drawn. No one has a clue, except your wife,
about what happened on White Sand Beach back then.
She wanted the girl to disappear and be gone.

Beware, they’re already bringing her, bringing her, bringing her.
The little Asian girl is still alive.
It was nothing special, but it was a flop.

I am the Grüner Veltliner

I am the Grüner Veltliner.

I fly over Berlin

with my stepson,

with Blue Karkulín.

In the thermal spa. It happened at the thermal spa.

In Bad Schandau, in the thermal spa.

On the massage jet in the thermal spa.

I am as sharp as the neighbor’s Lumpi.

(I want to fuck some woman)

You live high on the hog.

I have you in my clutches.

A good rooster never gets fat.

The love adventure (we bathe).

has just begun (we urinate).

I love bathing in your sweat.

I love your skin and FUCK.

You have me in your clutches.

Love at first sight.

He is the Grüner Veltliner.

He cuddles with my lap.

I fly over Turin

to my cavalier.


Andy and I run.

Kiss, piss, drink.

Dogs chase us, catch us,

but never succeed.

We meet hot girls.

We sit on the bench.

Together we go to copulate.

We fly into the night.


After hundreds of inflammations


After hundreds of affairs, you still crave more.

After hundreds of inflammations, the foreskin narrows.

Instead of penetrations and thrusts, you limp around unhappily.

With an ointment full of corticoids, you now suffer at home.

With chronic phimosis, everyone laughs at you.

With cystic fibrosis, we have poor digestion.

They’ll just make a small cut, don’t worry, it’s nothing.

With a happy circumcision, everyone wants you again.


Please proceed after the tone.

For underwater massage, please queue.

It is forbidden to jump into the swimming pool.

It is mandatory to take a shower.

Hévíz, Hévíz, Hévíz, Hévíz.

We are driving on the motorway, our destination is Hévíz.

We are coming all the way from Hortobágy, carrying currants.

At Kocsi Csárda, Margita sips Baileys.

Under the table, she licks our balls, and that’s the best.

We are driving on the motorway, our destination is Hévíz.

We are driving all the way from Hortobágy, our shoes are pressing us.

We have kidney stones inside us, lotuses smell here.

Excrement floats nearby, and the old man is jerking off on the sunbed.

Hairy girl

I don’t love it when girls shave.I don’t like it when girls don’t have hair. Gaging in the car under Točník castle.Burning on your thighs with my cigar.Tribulation in the middle of a balmy night.Binding.  Now you belong only to your kidnapper. Drowning in the puddle behind the hayloft.Choking on an old necklace.A hairy girl indulges.

She enjoys everything, savors everything.

Strangulation with a leather wristband.

Photographing with an old Flexaret camera.

A hairy girl who undresses.

Naked, she dies by the grove.

We’ll meet at the caravanserai (inspired by the novel The Island by B. Bellová)

We’ll meet at night in the caravanserai, We’ll bring out oriental memories.

Once everyone in the region feared us. They read murderous stories about us.

I learned how to lead a dagger wound and to think of you before sleeping.

You wallow in blood and I swell with pride. In the brain, a fatal failure occurred.

We’ll meet at the caravanserai, with laudanum in our blood.

We won’t die, we’ll satisfy your sexual organs.

I have a bag made of the skin of unborn lambs, I will hide it in the stove of the temple kitchen.

We’ll hide behind the aedicula. Later, we’ll enter your tushie.

I like the time when the camels copulate. I watch them and have laudanum in my blood.

If we don’t die, we’ll come in September, we’ll satisfy your genitals.

We’ll meet at the caravanserai, with laudanum in our blood.

We won’t die, we’ll satisfy your sexual organs.

We carry dates like monkey heads, extracts from pearls, from corals.

We carry cashmere, carafes, goats, gold and saffron from the ships.

Hey hey, Mister

Hey hey, Mister, hey hey, Mister,

Hey hey, Mister, I‘ll sell you my sister.

I fly with Andy on a butterfly.

We are sweet as candy. Born to love.

We fly into dark, starless night.

Demons and kites fly around us.

Tom is so charming. He is born to delight.

Our light shines throughout the universe.

Unearthly far beyond human sight.

Tired, confused, crucified.

Tell me where to fly, tell me where to fly.

Tell me, Mystic man, tell me secret plan.

Tom, please take my hand.

I wanna fly with you.

Show me the way, please.

Show me how.

Teach me please.

Pneumonium (Homage to the Holy Paunch)

When wounds palpitate of infection, fissures form.

In the apneic pause the pulse rumbles in the vertex.

Decreased saturation with bradycardia.

Inflammation and convulsions with pneumonia.

Hey you sucker, when I saw the cops.

Such a misfortune, it wasn’t wonderful.

Mind your own business!

But that really pissed me off!

You, you, Tom, you are my horny professor.

I follow you on the train and listen to the Sex Pistols.

You are my Honey, I love doing boom boom.

I’m looking forward to you drowning me in your cum.

I am the knight of the amorous bloom. This is a tribute to the Holy Paunch.

You are so lustful…

The appearance of palpable neoplasms and their puffiness.

Bleeding, bloating, nocturnal itching.

There are anodermal duplicates.

Also anal, perianal fissures.

Pneumonium, Anodermalium, Duplicatorium, Perianalium.

Bradycardium, Anodermalium, Perianalium, Valium.



I have a charmsual toothache.

I am in limbo, in sudatorium, in the antechamber of hell.

In the cattle region, in the service of page’s.

We live in the year of the great medlars.

I am fucklover, spermphiliac, hardphallus.

I have ergot poisoning, may the syphilis seize you.

May a chancre disfigure your limbs.

May a downpour settle in your anus.

May epilepsy dominate you.

May the hole burn you.

In the week of three Thursdays our balls did swell.

The itch mite. Homenas do defecate.

I am screwlover, spermphile, hardphallus.

I have ergot poisoning, may the pox seize you.

May a chancre disfigure your limbs.

May a downpour settle in your anus.


With an infusion set for my master

I hurry by steamboat with Buscopan.

I’m already flying with Indometacin.

I have a boating accident under Tetín village.

The steam boiler exploded under the chimney.

A box of insulin burned up.

A gravedigger passed by with Myšpulín.

They took me on a boat under Cholín.

And here I wait, twisting in pain.

My dear hurries with the infusion set.

She will ease the colic, kidney stone in a bag.

We will send it for analysis by pneumatic tube post.

Renal colic. Surely they’ll send it.

Nothing drips over the night vase.

With urolithiasis, nothing ejaculate from the urethra.

I know, it’s vague. Obstructive colic.

Retrograde climax. Just no panic.